Fasting- a spiritual discipline

She wanted to thank me. Thank me for praying for her and her spouse. They were doing much better now. They both got the YouVersion of the Bible on their phones and were even participating in the daily reading plans. They both started praying with the kids on the way to school.   Her life is being transformed…

She went on to say that she had recently completed a 21 day fast. What?!? “Why and how did you do that?”  Even though things were going better, she had reached what seemed to be an impasse in her spiritual life and felt there was a wall she could not get past. Then, her YouVersion of the Bible had an article on the benefits of fasting.

She sheepishly and apologetically shared that she only made it 19 days, not the full 21. Her husband reminded her that God is more concerned about the desire and the deepening relationship than fulfilling a 21 day commitment. Most people who come forward for prayer after the worship service are struggling with a variety of challenging (to say the least) situations and she just wanted to rejoice in what God has been up to.

I shared with them that I must be a spiritual weanie, because I only fast one day a week! For the last few years, not sure exactly when I started, I have done what is called a “Wesley fast”. More about that a little later. As I began the journey into inner or emotional healing for myself and also found myself praying for others, I decided to start fasting. Unlike other friends, I did not see a huge difference or get any major breakthroughs but I kept going. Not only did I want to see God move more in my prayers with others, but I also, desperately wanted to hear more from Him. So often, while praying with others, I am in way over my head and pay grade, so I depend on Him to show up.

Why fast? In Richard Foster’s classic book, “Celebration of Discipline”, he says that fasting is “the voluntary denial of a normal function for the sake of intense spiritual activity.” It seems, and actually is, quite counter-cultural to deprive yourself of something so basic. Jesus fasted, regularly. Matthew 4:1,2 says, “Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry.” Jesus also told his followers, “When you fast…”, so it was a pretty standard thing in His day. Fasting makes us physically weak but spiritually strong and prepares us to do God’s work.

The spiritual discipline of fasting is an act of humility. Psalm 35:13 says, “I put on sackcloth and humbled myself with fasting.” When we humble ourselves and draw closer to God, He promises to draw closer to us. We as humans are really “spirit critters” that happen to be wrapped in a human body with flesh. So often, we allow our bodies to dictate what and how we will live. As we deny ourselves as an act of consecration, we are better able to exercise self-control.

Fasting also helps us become sensitive to the Holy Spirit. In Acts 13:2 we read, “While they were worshiping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, “Set apart Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.” So, when we deny ourselves of our natural cravings for food, our spiritual antennas become sharper. We can become more sensitive to His voice and we are better able to focus on God, submitting to His will. Fasting reduces the power of self so that the Holy Spirit can do a more intense work within us.

While fasting, it is probably best not to let others know what you are up to. People will think you are weird and will not understand.  Also, Jesus said not to do it in a showy way or wearing a long face of suffering. Get cleaned up and be content that your Father sees what is being done in secret and He will reward you. Read Matthew 6:16-18. When I first started fasting, I was grumpy. Not the benefit I was going for! Also, do not do this as a weight reduction plan since that would not be the right motivation.

So, what should we focus on? Seek the Lord by committing to prayer and Bible reading during the times you normally would eat. Be prepared to change in whatever way God may lay on your heart. If God speaks or puts His finger on something, do it right away whether it is an issue of forgiveness or a personal habit. Also, be expectant! Even if He does not answer your prayers immediately, persevere and trust that He is a work in the spiritual realm. After all, He is always at work.

The easiest way that I know of to try fasting is by using the “Wesley fast”. It is appropriately named after the famous evangelist and theologian John Wesley, whose “methods” helped found the Methodist church. Wesley and his leaders were required to fast two days a week, along with serious Bible study and discipleship. If they did not keep up, there were not allowed to be part of the “class”, our modern day small groups.

Fasting is much easier than you would imagine. Contrary to popular opinion, and the ads for fast food, you will not expire by missing a meal or two. The prescription for the “Wesley fast” is pretty simple. After supper, do not eat anything. The next day, skip breakfast and lunch. No snacking! You can break the fast late afternoon or at your normal suppertime. It is very important that if you suffer from blood sugar problems or are pregnant, not to consider this without speaking to your doctor.

There are a variety of other kinds of fasts that you might want to work up to. For instance, there is a 21 day fast and also what is called a “Daniel fast” to consists of juices, whole grains, no meat, etc. A simple Google search will give you details.

Finally, you might consider using the money you would have spent on food and give it as an offering to help others. Isaiah 58 suggests that a true fast results in getting help, either in our own hearts or to affect other people’s lives in a positive way.

You could use that money to sponsor a Compassion International child for $38 a month. Hint, hint. Missy and I will be fasting on Fridays along with our new Compassion partner church in Santa Cruz, Bolivia named “20 de Mayo”. Each Friday, as a staff, and as a church, they fast together and then meet for prayer on Friday nights. They claim there is no way they could deal with all the poverty and all the needs of their people without God’s intervention, so fasting is a necessary, yet powerful, tool for them. Hopefully, you will try it and find that to be true in your life as well.

No Matter How Deep the Pit is...

We are all addicts or recovering from something, but after reading the front page of today's paper, once again the stats are in our face about meth and oxycontin use. In Kentucky, we are losing an alarming rate of young people (and older) to this addiction.

Missy and I got back from our trip with Compassion International this past Wednesday and on Thursday, I shared a message about Addictions and Strongholds at our monthly "Learning to Pray" series. The message had come together pretty good over the last three weeks but I needed a good way to start it so I did a Google search and simply typed in "statistics on addictions". You can read the stats yourself on Tobacco, Alcohol, Cocaine, Meth, Gambling, Prescription drugs, Sexual addiction, Pornography and Eating Disorders. These are all challenging, to say the least, not to mention my potential addiction to chocolate or my Mom's addiction to shopping!

In Romans 7:14-25, Paul sums up the problem of our human condition. Take a minute and read it in a translation that you can understand easily. We all struggle with sin, and even though we know what we should do, and want to do it, we do the very thing that we hate and know is wrong. Even though we know God’s law, our human nature is at work within us to make us prisoners and slaves to sin. Satan, our adversary, seeks to devour us all through his lies and deception. His goal is to entangle us in sin and strip us of our freedom.

I used to love to watch the Tarzan movies, as a kid with Johnny Wiesmueller. One of the most frightening episodes for me as a kid was when Tarzan’s son, Boy, got tangled up in a huge spider web and he was struggling to get loose.  Our Enemy continues to spin many webs and we get hung up in them. “Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.” I Peter 5:8

Paul acknowledges his inability to free himself from the slavery of sin and asks the question in Romans 7, “Who will rescue me?”. Then, he quickly follows with the answer, “Jesus Christ, my Lord.” So, first of all, we need to learn from Paul. The answer is “who” will deliver us, not “what!” The very heart of addiction is loss of freedom. One of the main themes of the Gospel of Jesus is freedom. “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” John 8:36.

When we talk about addictions, we are actually talking about bondage and slavery. But, what is an addiction? An addiction is any compulsive or habitual behavior that robs us of freedom. People who struggle with addictions are not in harmony with themselves or with God. They are like the story of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde that represents the good versus the evil within us. They are literally held prisoner by the addiction, whatever it is. The point is that if anything has control and power over them, it is an addiction. The addiction becomes the object of desire and it displaces God in their own lives. The attachment has moved into idolatry, where there is nothing more important that the thing itself.

How do people get to the point of bondage? Usually, some level of emotional pain will cause them to medicate themselves in order to get relief from the pain. The addiction works, but only temporarily. It is not that people intend to sin or do evil things; they just want the pain to go away.

There are a variety of ways that Jesus wants (and is able) to intervene in our lives to take away the pain of what compels us to try to numb it. There are prayers for inner healing, cutting free prayers, cleansing prayers for the mind, body and spirit, physical healing prayers, generational prayers, breaking of inner vows and judgements, etc.

Here is a wonderful prayer from Robert McGee in “The Search for Significance”.

“I have great worth, apart from my performance because Christ gave His life for me. And therefore imparted great value to me. I am deeply loved, fully pleasing, totally forgiven, accepted and complete in Jesus Christ.”

It is important to start listening to the voice of truth and not the lies of our Enemy. May God bless you in your journey to recovery and wholeness. 

Absolutely nothing is impossible for Jesus Christ. 

He promises us freedom. Corrie Ten Boom said, “No matter how deep the pit is, He is deeper still.”

Praying together and the intimacy it creates

Recently, I had the pleasure of teaching with my wife, Missy, as we tackled the topic of "Learning How to Pray Together as a Couple." It was a blast and we all laughed a lot. What is not funny is that for first time marriages the divorce rate is about 41%, second marriages is about 60% and third marriages is about 73%. The divorce rate is about the same for those in the church as for those not in the church. A new study found that 1% of marriages where the couple prays together gets divorced. 99% success rate is a pretty encouraging statistic! So, why do couples not pray together more? We will get to that in a minute.

Here are a few reasons that we should pray together more as couples.
Prayer promotes unity in your family but it is hard because it takes two to be in a marriage! Meshing dreams, desires, attitudes and habits is challenging. In the Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes 3:22 we read, "A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back to back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple braided cord is not easily broken."


Praying together promotes good communication and emotional intimacy. God can help bring down the walls that separate you due to busyness, workaholism, unforgiveness, strife, boredom and child rearing. If God commands you to pray for your enemies, how much more does He want you to pray for and with the person with whom you have become one?

Praying together invites God to work in your relationship. For a marriage to last and be happy and fulfilling, three parties need to be involved; the husband, the wife and the Lord. The more you pray together, the more you will see God do great things.

Before you start, take the time to talk with each other about your thoughts and feelings about prayer and praying together. Don't try to pressure or make the other feel guilty. See if you can agree that this is something you both want in your marriage. Be vulnerable and talk about your fears.

Pick a specific time and make a commitment to each other to begin praying together at that time. Some of us are morning people and others are night owls. Pick a place as well. Then, don't be upset if you miss a day. Consistency will develop over time. Give each other permission to initiate, but one of you might want to "own" this responsibility. Start where you are both comfortable. There is no right or wrong way to do this. Agree at the beginning that neither of you will preach in your praying. Don't scold or nag! A very common fear is that one's spouse will use this time to preach rather than to pray.

Start with a list or agenda of things you might want to pray about. Try using something like the acronym "ACTS" as a model. "A" is for adoration and praising God for who He is. "C" is for confession, things we did or things we should have done. "T"is for thanksgiving, being thankful for the blessings we enjoy or recounting answered prayers. "S" is for supplication, which means praying for ourselves and for others.

OK, so HOW do we do it?!? Here are a few options to consider;
Pray silently together. Just because you agree to pray together does not mean you have to do it out loud. Sit down and hold hands, share a few mutual concerns then say, "Let's pray about this." Whoever finishes first should squeeze the other's hand to signal that they are done. When the other person finishes, he or she squeezes back. Congratulations! You have just prayed together!

Finish the silent prayer aloud. This is just an extension of the way described above. Instead of ending the time of prayer together with a squeeze of the hand, agree that after a squeeze of the hand, the other person will finish the silent prayer out loud. A very simple sentence just like thanking God for the time you just shared together.

Write out your prayer. Try writing out a short, simple prayer that is meaningful to you. When you both come together to pray, just read them out loud. Enjoy hearing each other talk to God.

Pray out loud together, daily. Hopefully, at this stage, you are now comfortable enough with the process that you can speak out loud your prayers in front of our spouse.

Practice "vulnerable" prayer. This is the kind of prayer that each of you may fear what it means to pray together. It can be difficult, but in this type of prayer, we are vulnerable and bring out our failures, struggles and openly talk with God in front of our spouse. Remember, the goal is not to pray vulnerably together, but it is simply to pray together, consistently.

A New Beginning

Welcome to the blog and release of The Prayer Institute website! Glad you stopped by. A few years ago, I was having a cup of Earl Grey tea with my friend and prayer mentor, Tim Jones (who is a UMC pastor but more commonly known as “Pastor Tim” by college students all over), when Tim shared that he thought the Lord wanted me to develop a website. We agreed it sounded like a good idea and decided to pray about it some more.
Over three years later, one day in prayer, I heard the Lord speak to my heart these words, “The Prayer Institute”. It made good sense to me since I had spent the last several years trying to learn more about prayer. My interest in prayer cranked up immensely when Sally, my former wife of 20 years, had been diagnosed with stage IV colon cancer. In the midst of surgeries, biopsies, chemo, radiation therapies and scans, we continued to seek the Lord for answers related to healing. In the midst of suffering we found what the Psalmist records as, “deep calls to deep”, unbelievable joy and measures of peace that were more than adequate for what we were facing. As we continued to pray with and for others, we regularly saw God work in miraculous ways, both in physical and emotional (inner) healing. The Lord chose to give Sally the ultimate healing in 2007.

Much to my surprise and far exceeding any desires or expectations I had, He blessed me with a new bride and a partner in ministry. Missy had been involved in ministry at Crossroads Christian Church in Lexington, KY. Crossroads has been gracious enough to allow me to put my passion for prayer and love for people into service. Presently, we have over 40 trained prayer ministers and the momentum for prayer continues to grow.

The need for prayer, and the freedom it brings, is just as relevant today as it was when Jesus Christ popped up on the scene. This was His mission statement: ““The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. 
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” Luke 4:18,19 (NIV).

It is so exciting to see Christ at work today and I am thrilled to play a small part in the story that is unfolding. People are hearing the good news that God loves them, they are being released from the prison of guilt and shame, and set free from things that have kept them down for years, no longer blinded by the lies of the Enemy.

If you want to talk over any of these things or explore how I may be of help to you, your small group or church, let me know. Send me an email or let’s meet for a cup of tea sometime and talk about it.